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Weird. I'm not in a bad mood and I'm not upset, but I'm really craving music that makes me feel weathered. I don't get it. Anjelica made a crack at me today that I shouldn't be bothered by, but it's bothering me just the same. I don't know why. Guess I'm hyper sensitive all of the sudden. I guess I'm ok. My back still kind of hurts, but it's getting better. Still at work. Nate's been working this rediculous amount lately. I hope he's at home, getting some rest. His big project is due later today as I understand it. Love and kudos to him, I'm sure it's wonderful!!!!!!

But the music thing has me in some wierd frame of mind.

Real love
Real love
I'll take your kisses, take your heart
Everything if it hurts
I love my sister so (turn on shine)
She don't smother me (turn on shine, on shine)
I played the spades I know (on shine)
I'm a Jack of all trades
Would you bury me?
Once you see her
One inside (hide, hide)
Some of the things you just can't hide
If you see her
Tell me why hurry, hurry
Why won't she come outside?
She will bury me

tell me i'm the only one
tell me there's no other one
jesus was an only son, yeah
tell me i'm the chosen one
jesus was an only son for you
despite all my rage i am still just a rat in a cage
despite all my rage i am still just a rat in a cage
then someone will say what is lost can never be saved
despite all my rage i am still just a rat in a cage
despite all my rage i am still just a rat in a
despite all my rage i am still just a rat in a
despite all my rage i am still just a rat in a cage
tell me i'm the only one
tell me there's no other one
jesus was an only son for you
and i still believe that i cannot be saved

head like a hole
black as your soul
i'd rather die
than give you control
head like a hole
black as your soul
i'd rather die
than give you control
bow down before the one you serve
you're going to get what you deserve

you can have my isolation
you can have the hate that it brings
you can have my absence of faith
you can have my everything
help me
tear down my reason
help me
it's your sex i can smell
help me
you make me perfect
help me become somebody else
i wanna fuck you like an animal
i wanna feel you from the inside
i wanna fuck you like an animal
my whole existence is flawed
you get me closer to god

I've watched you from a distance
I've passed you on the street
I'm obsessed with you
I don't know what to do
To make you pay attention
and fall in love with me
I'm obsessed with you
I don't know what to do
Guess there's no place to hide
when you're screaming inside
There's no place to hide
when you're screaming inside
I've explained it in my letters
I'm miserable as sin
I'm obsessed with you
What am I gonna do?
Guess there's no place to hide
when you're screaming inside
There's no place to hide
when you're screaming inside

You can keep me company
As long as you don't care
I'm only happy when it rains
You wanna hear about my new obsession?
I'm riding high upon a deep depression
I'm only happy when it rains
Pour some misery down on me

I fall down just to give you a thrill
Prop me up with another pill
If I should fail, if I should fold
I nailed my faith to the sticking pole

I think I'm paranoid
Manipulated
I think I'm paranoid
Too complicated
Bend me
Break me
Anyway you need me
All I want is you
Bend me
Break me
Breaking down is easy
All I want is you

This is the noise that keeps me awake
My head explodes and my body aches
Push it (make the beats go harder)
Push it (make the beats go harder)
I'm sorry that I hurt you
Please don't ask me why
I want to see you happy
I want to see you shine