Currently dashing the hopes of my parents. (lolasenvy) wrote,
Currently dashing the hopes of my parents.

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I'm tired of living this life

I can't do this anymore.

My mother called and told me that I was a theif and a liar and she is unbelievably disappointed in me. She told me that I was going to wind up a useless, talentless, pregnant, failure like my friends.

Then she told me she is pressing charges because Jason was smoking at my house and 'I allowed it'.

All my bills have been called in. I am exactly $320 in debt and I have no idea how I'm going to get out of it.

My grandmother lied to my mom amd she believed it. It was set up to ensure my mother stayed out of affairs concerning the house. I was the fall guy.

I'm in debt, and I'm absolutely shattered at the way my mother uses everything including Dennis to berate me. I accept that I'm a poor caregiver, but I'm trying to help and being told that his death is going to be my fault doesn't make that easy.

Oh, and I might lose my job to boot. The new management wants our resumes and air checks. It's not likely that I will lose the job, but God hates me. So I'm worried.

Because I have nothing left, I'm going to say something I feel deserved. I'm not starting drama, and please don't post some stupid bullshit 'Amen' if it doesn't concern you. And it doesn't.

Andrew: I am beyond hurt that you just blew me off last night. I needed you about MY JOB. If you don't give a damn about me; fucking let me know so I can move on. I'm trying to be your friends in the best way that I can. It's one thing when you thwart my attempts to spend time with. However, I needed you and you just weren't there. That's being a bad friend. Period. I would be there an any way that I could be if you needed me. I wish you could talk to me like a mature person if you have a problem WITH ME and if you do not, stop treating me like a leper. As I'm sure you've read, I really need you right now.
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