I mean I'm smart, capable, employed, funny, easy...
Why won't anyone date me???
Back in the beginning I wanted a motivated, successful, intelligent, older man with security and prodigious wit.
Now I want a mammal.
So my lame ass is standing here while normal people sleep staring at a picture that is staring back at me. But he isn't real, man. Why does my heart hurt so? Romantics no longer exist. They're all thirty-somethings gay men.
Oh, like that's a big ol' baboons-ass surprise to you.
Hell, I look at my love-happy friends and I get tired. It's sick. My gay friends have to be curious about girls right? A little bit? I'll think about baseball. Oh, Fuck it.
I hope I never fall in love. What hurts this much staring at a picture would most certainly kill me in reality.